Montessori Philosophy: Praise vs. Encouragement

When I was growing up, I thought one of the best things anyone could say to me was "You're such a good girl." I tried hard to be good and to live up to the expectations set before me. I wanted to be good; I wanted my parents to be proud of me. Later in life, I would tell people "You'd be so proud of me!" Until one day, someone asked me, "But, are you proud of you?"

When I became a Montessori teacher, I kept hearing from other teachers about not praising the children's work. What? Could I actually be hearing them correctly? Montessori teachers don't praise work? How then did a child know if she'd done the work correctly? My colleagues suggested I use encouragement instead of praise. They suggested phrases like "Well, how do you think you did? What do you think of your work? What would you do differently if you had a chance to do the work again?" It sounded like a bad counseling session to me, so I sat and listened and observed my colleagues in action.